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January 29, 2004

What a weird world

So it is 10:15 and I am at work, getting ready to go to Josh Inzer's dad's funeral.

It's still surreal. :-( I think he died of a heart-attack on Sunday. He was running-see its like the whole Dr. Atkins thing. Here was this man who revolutionized the way most people diet-all so we can live longer, blah blah blah, and the man slip, falls into a coma and dies. SEE it just doesn't make sense.

Keep the Inzer's in your prayers, today and the coming will be so difficult for them, I am glad they are a good close family, and all the kids have support of such wonderful wonderful friends. They are lucky indeed.

January 26, 2004

sorry I am better now

Yeah so my last entry was a little crazy, but hey i was emotional and all that. But things are better-really better Adam,and I are actually back together (sshh its all a ploy to get my ring back haha) so things are fabulous. and tonight is my first belly dancig class-how cool is that?

January 19, 2004

wove, true wove-BULLSHIT

so all this crisis over the wedding not happening has really got me thinking about everything that I used to believe was true. Sorry in advance if this turns into some sort of psychotic/bleeding heart romance BS.

SO OK I was always one of those people who beleived that there was that one special person out there who you were totally meant for and vice-versa, and that no matter what, at whatever-cost you two would always be together, you know that Romeo and Juliet sort of belief I guess. And you would go through hell and back just to be with that person, because you two were special and noone else could understand all that.

But more recently I have just begun thinking that maybe that is all crap, and we are just going to marry who's convenient and the most pain-free. I mean here I was all thinking that Adam was my soulmate and all that jazz and he felt the same way and then-oh wait nope he doesn't feel the same way- I mean hell it only took him 7 years to figure it out, no he would rather spend time with his soulmates-money and POS falling down houses. He keeps telling me, maybe we will get back together and this is the biggest mistake I have ever made, and I understand if you find someone else-WHAT!! so is he just going to sit around with his thumb up his ass and wait for God only knows what?

I don't understand this whole thing at all. I mean good lord, what is he waiting on? Who knows, but I bet you his mom wasn't telling him he made a mistake when he told her of his assanine decison. Do you know it actually took her a month to contact me? and then it was some lame pissy email about oh well better now then later! EXCUSE ME! after 7 years thats what she had to say. F-her.

It also is strange how now I don't even care about all that stupid wedding stuff like I did before. I have been scorned, I mean my mom even bought one of those little flags that hang off of people's porche's. All I could think about doing was- actually nothing. At no time did I ever really seriously entertain the thought of hurting Adam or anything of his. I mean nothing could match what I felt emotionally and even if I could find some way of inflicting that on someone, I never would. Have I turned soft?

January 14, 2004

Las Vegas here I come...

Yay this job rocks, not only do I make decent money but I also get to go to Las Vegas at the end of this month. The annual NADA (www.nada.org) convention is going to be out there this year and we are going to schmooze and hopefully sign up some new advertisers! We are staying at Mandalay Bay hotel, it is awesome, it has a spa and all that jazz. They also have a wedding chapel so I may come back as the new Mrs. Wayne Newton! Yippeee